“Oh, let me warn you, sisters in Jerusalem, by the gazelles, yes, by all the wild deer: Don’t excite love, don’t stir it up, until the time is ripe --- and you’re ready.” – Song of Solomon 2:7
“…Don’t excite love, don’t stir it up, until the time is ripe and you’re ready” has literally been in the pit of my soul for days now. Now, let me first say that I am as single as the four quarters in my cup holder. Don’t make any sense, huh? Yeah, that’s how single I am. Pray for me saints. (ha) But no, really. I know the struggle. I know the struggle of being/feeling rejected. I know the struggle of really not liking “Dae-Dae” because he does this high-pitched laugh I just can’t get with, or even the struggle of “there’s plenty of fish in the sea, honey, just be patient. *heavy side eye and eye roll* If someone can send me a memo of which sea everyone seems to be fishing in to the comment box on our blog site, I’d really appreciate it! But no, again, I really have been there and fight every day not to go back there. I’ve felt the feeling of thinking I wasn’t attractive enough or just straight up not good enough because some man didn’t choose me to be his little boo thang (straight up foolishness). So, before I really try to break this thing down let’s cast these thoughts of foolishness and shake it off. Pray with me: “God, I thank you for choosing me. I thank you for loving me and creating me not in the realms of fear but of awesome wonder. The plans you have for me go beyond my little raggedy emotions and boxed in imagination, and I will trust in the path you have chosen for me. Thank you for your relentless love that continues to pursue me more than any other human being on this earth, and I thank you for helping me rest in that love. In Jesus' name, Amen.” Ok, whew! Now that we have declared that we are the bomb (because of Jesus love, of course). Let’s get to it! “Don’t excite love, don’t stir it up, until the time is ripe.” What does that even mean? Various translations of the Bible tell us not to awaken love before it’s time. Some of y'all gon' try and act like y'all don’t even know what that means. But it’s cool, I’m here. You know us women can be straight up forcers and try to force things because homie is kinda fine or whatever and the simple fact is: we just straight up thirsty. We get real cotton mouth for different people who aren’t even meant for us. “I aint never force nothing with no man in my life.” Baby girl, liking every picture on his Instagram and low key knowing his whole family by name before he even really knows your name is forcing it. This is the problem, here: We sometimes put so much focus on a certain (or a few, I don’t know your life, playa) man in just little things we do. Whether it's scrolling up and down his Instagram every couple of hours or even consuming our time texting and talking to him, resulting in not having enough time to sit before God, or even clean our dog on bathroom tub. We literally begin to idolize a human being (idol: anything you think about and give attention to more than God) and then when it doesn’t work out, our whole life comes crashing down. Now we are depressed, lonely, questioning our worth and straight up mad at God. Yo, it’s so funny how we be mad at God for something he clearly told us NO to. Let me say this: I know the feelings of depression, anxiety, so on and so forth are real life emotions and I’m not trying to downplay them. But those emotions were not meant for you. They weren’t created for you to rest in, and they are sent straight from the pits of hell. I am so sick and tired of women feeling like they aren’t enough because of a man. You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalms 139:14), like straight up, this is not a game. *Puts hands on my head and paces the floor* God has created someone special just for you! Trust Him! His plan is perfect. What is for you will pursue you - every time! I know you gave that man your all, and he didn’t do nothing with it. I get it. But let it go. Give it to Jesus. Be fly! Learn to cook (currently)! Write a book! Learn scripture! Spend time in the presence of God! Grow as a woman! Help other women! Do and be all that God has called you to be. I really believe the person for you will align with your purpose. The person for me will align with my purpose (excuse me, while I stir myself up right quick). But, if you are so busy trying to find you’s a man and don’t even know what the purpose of your life looks like, your little find-a-man quick scheme isn’t going to go too smooth. Stop exciting things you aren’t ready for! Your fullness and wholeness is in Christ Jesus. Period, end, point blank. And if you don’t take the time to really rest in that promise and grow in it, every encounter you have with a counterfeit (a man you think is God’s best for you) will ruin you. I encourage those who may be in a current relationship that you know God has already given you that little nudge, like, “nah bruh, he aint it”. Leave, and ask God for courage to do so. And let’s be real, we are aware of those little nudges of no’s God gives us. But, we choose to ignore them because we really don’t trust God with our whole lives. “But, Ariel, I love him, he fine, he got a little money honey and he makes me happy.” And that’s all great, I bet he is an awesome person. But be led by the Holy Spirt inside of you and pay close attention. Pray! Pray! Pray! Pray about the person you may be or want to be involved with. God will reveal things to you that you can’t see. That person could be a great person but just not God’s best for you, and that’s okay. The good news is that God has even better for you! Also, side note: Let’s please throw the happiness part straight out the window. Like, being happy is a very important component of life and it will be present when you yield to God’s perfect plan for you. But stop depending on a man to make you happy! Happy is an emotion based from a condition and we all know the conditions of life change. So choose to be surrendered over happy! Now, that’s a good word right there! But I’ll tell y’all more later. Always remember: Yes to the wrong relationship is no to God’s best for you. Don’t get in the way of what God wants to orchestrate in your life. Allow Him to be the head of your life and stop trying to be in control. He knows you, and He knows who and what you need (thanks Jeff Bethke for the nugget, look him up!). Matthew 6:31-33 (MSG) tells us: “So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ 32 These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. 33 Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need. Lastly, there is NOTHING wrong with dating or courting at all. I just want you to be led by God in all that you do and pursue friendship before marriage while setting Jesus as your foundation. Don’t settle for the 7 when God has promised you a 10. I’m out. I love you, foreal! Xo -A
2 Comments
Jamaal
12/17/2016 11:26:03 am
I really loved this. Even though after a few paragraphs I realized it was catered to women lol. I really could appreciate the insight, the experience and revelation, and the facts given straight from the Word. This advice definitely goes for men as well when trying to find a wife. We can't settle just because we want a family and want real love because eventually we will realize that we aren't satisfied and then, again like you like you said, we will begin to blame God and everybody else but ourselves for a decision He had nothing to do with. We have to be patient and we have to trust God, period. He knows what's best for us. I really liked this Queen and I appreciate you for being transparent and sharing your life with people in order to help them overcome certain situations and let them know that they aren't alone in this fight. Continue to trust God and walk in your purpose.
Reply
Britt
12/17/2016 08:13:40 pm
This was really great!
Reply
Leave a Reply. |
Covenant BlogArchives
|